A guy walks
into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while
he's drinking, the
monkey starts jumping all over the place. The
monkey grabs some
olives off the bar and
eats them, then grabs
some sliced limes and
eats them,then jumps up on the pool table,
grabs the cue ball, sticks
it in his mouth and
swallows it whole.
The bartender screams
at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just
did?" The guy says, "No,
what?" "He just ate the
cue ball off my pool
table - whole!" says the
bartender. "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me,"
replies the patron. "He
eats everything in sight,
the little twerp. I'll pay
for the cue ball and
stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, and
leaves. Two weeks later
he's in the bar again,
and he has his monkey
with him. He orders a
drink and the monkey starts running around the
bar again.
While the man is
drinking, the monkey
finds a maraschino
cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his
butt, pulls it out, and
eats it. The bartender is
disgusted. "Did you see
what your monkey did
now?" "Now what?" asks the patron. "Well, he
stuck a maraschino
cherry up his butt, then
pulled it out and ate it!"
says the barkeeper.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the
patron. "He still eats
everything in sight, but
ever since he ate that
damn cue ball he
measures everything first!"
.
