There are a number of perfectly reasonable excuses to avoid doing something you don't want to, but sometimes reason just won't cut it. A simple "I don't feel well" didn't fool your elementary school nurse the 80th time you used it, so it likewise isn't going to fool your boss. That's when you need an ironclad excuse that no one would ever question. But bullshxt is a powerful weapon, one not to be used lightly. If you don't know what we mean, consider these cautionary tales of insanity.