Love me when I'm old and shocking Peel off my elastic stockings Swing me from the chandeliers Let's be randy bad old dears Push around my chromed Bath Chair Let me tease your white chest hair Scaring children, swapping dentures Let us have some great adventures Take me to the Dogs and Bingo Teach me how to speak the lingo Bone my eels and bring me tea Show me how it's meant to be Take me to your special places Watching all the puzzled faces You in shorts and socks and sandals Me with warts and huge love-handles As the need for love enthrals Wrestle with my dampproof smalls Make me laugh without constraint Buy me chocolate body paint Hold me safe throughout the night When my hair has turned to white Believe me when I say it 's true I've waited all my life for you. -giveheart-