ava THE_SPEAR_KING: Old user reunion smiley
ava THE_SPEAR_KING: smiley
ava RezaMoody: Good morningsmiley
The closes I ever got to a 4.0 in college was my blood alcohol content

Home is where you can say anything you like, 'cause nobody listens to you anyway

When I told the doctor about my loss of memory, he made me pay in advance

I went alone on our honeymoon, my wife had already seen Niagara Falls

It was love at first sight, then I took a second look

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the 'terminal'?

Regular naps prevent old age.... especially if you take them while driving

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%, it's called Wedding Cake

If god had intended for man to use the metric system, jesus would have only had ten disciples

We have a quiet home life, I don't speak to her and she doesn't speak to me

Women are like police, they can have all the evidince in the world, but they still want a confession

After all is said and done, usually more is said than done

No one ever says "it's only a game", when their team is winning
(11:29) Sun, 15 Sep 13
smiley .sad.
(20:41) Sun, 29 Dec 13
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it back into your pocket.
(17:56) Sun, 15 Sep 13
(17:40) Sun, 15 Sep 13
I gave my son a hint, on his room door I put a sign: Checkout time is 18

Hard work never killed anybody - but why take the risk!

Kids in the backseat cause accidents; accidents in the backseat cause kids

If you can't laugh at yourself, I'll do it for you

How long a minute is depends on what side of the bathroom door you're on

Illiterate? .... Write for Free Help!

When two's company, three's the result!

Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around the sun

My wife says I never listen, or something like that...
(11:30) Sun, 15 Sep 13