Biggest Failure
CorbettRaven
2015/12/23 12:58
This topic is closed.
Today my little Luke and I went to the hospital for his weight review at Special Care Baby unit. However his weight remained constant, no increased at all. So the nurse felt upset about this, asking me if I fed him right.
I told the nurse I didn't wake him up for feeding when it was time to feed, when he was in the hospital he must be fed every 3 hours. At home, I wait for him to cry or look for milk because before I noticed that if I gave him on time he didn't usually take it. So I had to wait for him to cry.
Another thing was that even tho he cried for milk there were times when he only drank a little, like he latched on me only for 15 mins or less. I did tell the nurse about this, she suggested I must top up with the milk I stock in the freezer - this stock is for when I'm at work since I want my Luke to be breastfed.
I feel like I'm a totally incapable mother :( I've been sleeping less these days. Plus during the day I have to do the laundry. Thankfully my mother helps me a little for instance helps me bathe Luke, change his diapers etc.
But she isn't a pro when it comes to handling a preemie, so she just uses her years of experience of having full term babies to Luke, which I don't really approve of :(
And today my mum hinted about how happy wives would be when their husbands are with them bringing their babies to see the doctors or nurses. I feel really really am such an incapable mother. And again that feeling of wishing I'd give him for adoption came to me again. As I only want my Luke to be well :( And I knew he'd be happier with a complete family that could love him well. Unlike me :(
I told the nurse I didn't wake him up for feeding when it was time to feed, when he was in the hospital he must be fed every 3 hours. At home, I wait for him to cry or look for milk because before I noticed that if I gave him on time he didn't usually take it. So I had to wait for him to cry.
Another thing was that even tho he cried for milk there were times when he only drank a little, like he latched on me only for 15 mins or less. I did tell the nurse about this, she suggested I must top up with the milk I stock in the freezer - this stock is for when I'm at work since I want my Luke to be breastfed.
I feel like I'm a totally incapable mother :( I've been sleeping less these days. Plus during the day I have to do the laundry. Thankfully my mother helps me a little for instance helps me bathe Luke, change his diapers etc.
But she isn't a pro when it comes to handling a preemie, so she just uses her years of experience of having full term babies to Luke, which I don't really approve of :(
And today my mum hinted about how happy wives would be when their husbands are with them bringing their babies to see the doctors or nurses. I feel really really am such an incapable mother. And again that feeling of wishing I'd give him for adoption came to me again. As I only want my Luke to be well :( And I knew he'd be happier with a complete family that could love him well. Unlike me :(
saahir
2015/12/23 13:07
Luke will recover soon. Have faith in mercy of Almighty The God. Amen.
Don't be disappointed Sis, please, wait and pray for him.
Don't be disappointed Sis, please, wait and pray for him.
zugzwang
2015/12/23 13:24
my best wishes with Luke..he ll recover soon. God bless..
Samuel099
2015/12/23 16:48
breast feed him every 30 minute, saying this because you cant tell if he is hungry or not,,, Also give him coconut water only cos stuff nowadays are made of chemicals.. 👣👣👣
Page707
2015/12/23 19:37
listen to your mum. She knows the best. and get the father of the child to come and help you. i can't understand why today's farther are so slack to take up there responsibility. I get mad when I hear things like this
daily in my work I saw the same things. But we are busy to catch up with them.
daily in my work I saw the same things. But we are busy to catch up with them.
NinthElement
2015/12/24 02:15 Page707: listen to your mum. She knows the best. and get the father of the child to come and help you. i can't understand why today's farther are so slack to take up there responsibility. I get mad when I hear things like this
daily in my work I saw the same things. But we are busy to catch up with them.
I send my support for Luke to Yuni via Western Union, £200 so far and I'll double that before the new year. I may not have enough for the flights at the moment but I can make sure my son wants for nothing at least even if it means I have to go without myself daily in my work I saw the same things. But we are busy to catch up with them.
It is my dearest wish to meet him for real and I aim to do so in the next few months, so you might like to get the full picture before before passing judgement next time. Merry Christmas
NinthElement
2015/12/24 02:23
I know you are going to make a great mother sayang 
There couldn't be anyone more loving and devoted than you. You are doing very well for a first-timer, don't be afraid of the challenges as experience will focus your energy ever more effectively.
There couldn't be anyone more loving and devoted than you. You are doing very well for a first-timer, don't be afraid of the challenges as experience will focus your energy ever more effectively.
NinthElement
2015/12/30 19:19 Eeprom: .
.
That Ammount Would have been nearer £400 if you hadn't recently wasted £199 on a "BlackBerry Classic'' SmartPhone toy for YOURSELF! but guess thats your own priorities eh?even if it means I have to go without myself emo89#
topic id: 3370324 
I've given almost £500 to Yuni since last month. You don't know how long I waited to find a decent discount on that phone, and besides it's still boxed and sealed and will remain so for a while so I can easily sell it for a PROFIT if I really need to. As for having to go without, the thing that refers to is that I'm sending Yuni the money that would be more selfishly spent on airline tickets and hotels to see my son for a couple of weeks. You know very little about my life so don't judge someone until you walk in their shoes.
.
That Ammount Would have been nearer £400 if you hadn't recently wasted £199 on a "BlackBerry Classic'' SmartPhone toy for YOURSELF! but guess thats your own priorities eh?even if it means I have to go without myself emo89#
topic id: 3370324
NinthElement
2015/12/30 19:34 Libra: There are too many cildren already needing loving families;to bring another child into the world without even a moment of consideration is more than selfish...
And mostly, very important :when you have a child, you become fully responsible for the life of another human being. Think about how would you raise a child BEFORE having one!!
There are families around the world having half a dozen kids or more, pumping out babies one after the other even in countries where people are starving. This is how powerful MOST people find the need for their genes to continue! Life may be a struggle sometimes but it has to go on, even in dire circumstances. So in this context, is it fair to judge a man who has a child for the first time at the age of 35, and has no problem with sending support? A child who is btw my only heir to the fortune that's tied up in my home? Don't make me lose respect for you.
And mostly, very important :when you have a child, you become fully responsible for the life of another human being. Think about how would you raise a child BEFORE having one!!
NinthElement
2015/12/30 20:05 Libra: If I can't provide what is needed to raise a child why have one and complain later and raise an unhappy antisocial human being? Of course I'm not planning to have a child, maybe adopt one later, who knows, one of the abandoned ones by the Ones who wanted their genes to continue but didn't know how to? The world is full with them and unhappy adults with childhood traumas because of irresponsible parents .
I find this post insulting not just to me but to the mother of my child. There could be no one who will be a more loving mother than Yuni, and I will also be playing a real role in Luke's life soon enough. Yuni's mum is also wonderful and has much experience raising children.
CorbettRaven
2016/01/01 13:11 Libra: I think you're both irresponsible
I sorta agree with you that I'm in some ways irresponsible for letting the baby grow. It may sound stupid but I did it because I love the daddy.
Sometimes I get too exhausted I need a time off from this motherhood thingy. Hence I posted the topics. To shout out about my issue at my facebook or at my IG would be improper, as my society sees unmarried woman with a child as 'taboo'. Therefore I came here, sort of to release the tension. Sometimes I need to let out what's bothering me. This is my answer to your comment 'wash clothes in public'.
haris
2016/01/01 18:49
Sayang/yuni, First time mothers will definitely face more problems during pregnancy and after delivering the baby. You will insha Allah learn everything as the time goes on. I am a father of two daughters now, so I can understand how tough it can be especially when your partner is not around you. Having said that, we all have our own set of problems and hurdles in life, have to adjust and support each other somehow.
Remember this verse from Quran:
لَا ÙŠÙÙƒÙŽÙ„ÙÙ‘Ù٠اللَّه٠نَÙْسًا Ø¥Ùلَّا ÙˆÙسْعَهَا
“Allah does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear…â€
(Qur’an, 2:286).
Remember this verse from Quran:
لَا ÙŠÙÙƒÙŽÙ„ÙÙ‘Ù٠اللَّه٠نَÙْسًا Ø¥Ùلَّا ÙˆÙسْعَهَا
“Allah does not burden a soul beyond that it can bear…â€
(Qur’an, 2:286).
haris
2016/01/01 21:38 Eeprom: he sure burdens non believers, what does he think of homosexuals and Apostle's , heaven knows what he thinks of single mothers, will he welcome me with open arms and give me a hug or will he not be my friend for my atheist Attitudes
You're no more an atheist when you wanting Allah to open up His arms for you. you can only say this if u believe He exists. And I do not care about homosexuals, coz I'm not one of them, yes all me selfish. Faith is something where we understand, feel and trust in the unseen. Whatever I have understood of Islam is enough for me to believe and follow it, and the rest of any unnecessary questions will be answered some day in future or may be never. This Life is a Test, surprizes are bound to come.
This topic is closed.
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