** hanste raho ** by Swt.Raaz 2014/02/09 04:36
Ek din Santa ne apni
premika ko himmat
jutakar keh dala – I love
you.
Premika(Gusse se) : Jara
pyar se nahi keh sakte?
Santa : I love you Didi!!!!
Pati aur patni ghumne
gaye. Raaste me ek gadhe
ko ghaas kata
dekh patni ne pati se kaha
– Oo G tumhara rishtedaar
ghaas
kha raha hai, namaste
karo.
Pati – Namaste Sasur Ji
Santa ne Banta se
kaha,â€Sabse bada
challenge kya hai?â€
Banta replied – Answer
sheet ko khaali chod do
aur last me likh dena,
paas karke dikha.
Santa : Yaar aaj mein bus
ke peeche peecha daudkar
15 rupees bacha liye.
Banta : Kya yaar, tum to
bahut murkh ho, agar taxi
ke peeche bhagte to 150
rupees bachta!
Sardarni : Lo light chali
gayi.
Sardar : Light chali gayi hai
to fan chala do.
Sardarni :Lo fir se kar di na
sardaro wali baat. Agar fan
chalaunga to mombatti
bujh nahi jayegi!
Sardar to doctor: Jab mein
sota hu to mere sapne me
Live IPL Cricket match ane
lagta hai.
Doctor: Koi baat nahi ye
medicine sone se pehle
kha lena.
Sardar: Kal se khaonga, aaj
to final match hai!!!
Ek sarder ne air-hostess se
kaha, “Aapki shakal meri
biwi
se bahut milti haiâ€.
Air-hostess ne ye sunte hi
zordaar thappad uske
muh pe mara…
Sardar foran bola : “Aadat
bhi bahut milti haiâ€
Ek din Santa jungle se
gujar raha tha
Chudail ne use roka aur
kaha : Ho ho ho Ha ha ha…
Mein Chudail hu.
Sardar : Menu pata hai…
kyunki teri ek behen meri
biwi hai!
Ek chor Sardar jee k
mobile ko lekar bhar raha
tha.
Sardar hasne laga
Banta : Wo tumhare
mobile ko lekar bhag raha
hai aur tum hans rahe ho.
Sardar : Bhagne do,
charger to mere paas hai!
Santa ek black aur ek
white shocks pehenkar
school aata hai.
Madam : Ghar jao aur moje
badalkar aao.
Santa : Koi fayda nahi,
waha bhi ek black aur ek
white moja hi rakha hai.
Teacher : Santa batao ‘M’
for kya hota hai?
Santa : Sir, Mother!
Teacher : Right! Aab batao
W for kya hota hai?
Santa kuch sochne lagta
hai
Teacher : Santa kya soch
rahe ho?
Santa : Sir, mein yeh soch
raha tha ki Maa ulti kaise
ho gayi?
Girl-to-Boy – Aaye bewafe
tune sab kuch saaf kar
diya,
mera dil jala kar rakh kar
diya
Boy-to-Girl – Aye ladki, teri
kurbani bekar nahi jayegi,
bhej de rakh mujhe,
bartan manjne ke kaam
aayegi.
Santa : Banta itni sharab
na piya karo, tumhari
saanso tak se badbu aati
hai.
Yehi haal raha to tumhe
nark bhi jagah nahi milegi.
Banta : Don’t worry Santa.
Saanse to me yehi
chorrkar jaunga!!!
Sardar ne makhi ke legs
tod kar kaha, Ja udd ja..
Lekin Makkhi nahi udi, Sr
ne kaha..
“Aab to saabit ho gaya ki
agar makkhi ke legs tod di
jaye
to makkhi sun nahi
sakti!!!â€
Son(On Phone) : Maa! aaj
hum 2 se 3 ho gaye.
Mother : Sabbash Beta!
Ladka hua ya ladki.
Son : Nahi maa! tumhari
bahu ne dusri shaadi kar li.
Jo dete hai ladki ko tohfe,
Wo late hai unki shaadi
me sofe,
.
Jo jate hai unke piche,
Wo aate hai caro ke
neeche,
.
Jo kehte hai JAANU,
Wahi bante hai baacho ke
MAMU!!
Ek din Santa ne apni
premika ko himmat
jutakar keh dala – I love
you.
Premika(Gusse se) : Jara
pyar se nahi keh sakte?
Santa : I love you Didi!!!!
Pati aur patni ghumne
gaye. Raaste me ek gadhe
ko ghaas kata
dekh patni ne pati se kaha
– Oo G tumhara rishtedaar
ghaas
kha raha hai, namaste
karo.
Pati – Namaste Sasur Ji
Santa ne Banta se
kaha,â€Sabse bada
challenge kya hai?â€
Banta replied – Answer
sheet ko khaali chod do
aur last me likh dena,
paas karke dikha.
Santa : Yaar aaj mein bus
ke peeche peecha daudkar
15 rupees bacha liye.
Banta : Kya yaar, tum to
bahut murkh ho, agar taxi
ke peeche bhagte to 150
rupees bachta!
Sardarni : Lo light chali
gayi.
Sardar : Light chali gayi hai
to fan chala do.
Sardarni :Lo fir se kar di na
sardaro wali baat. Agar fan
chalaunga to mombatti
bujh nahi jayegi!
Sardar to doctor: Jab mein
sota hu to mere sapne me
Live IPL Cricket match ane
lagta hai.
Doctor: Koi baat nahi ye
medicine sone se pehle
kha lena.
Sardar: Kal se khaonga, aaj
to final match hai!!!
Ek sarder ne air-hostess se
kaha, “Aapki shakal meri
biwi
se bahut milti haiâ€.
Air-hostess ne ye sunte hi
zordaar thappad uske
muh pe mara…
Sardar foran bola : “Aadat
bhi bahut milti haiâ€
Ek din Santa jungle se
gujar raha tha
Chudail ne use roka aur
kaha : Ho ho ho Ha ha ha…
Mein Chudail hu.
Sardar : Menu pata hai…
kyunki teri ek behen meri
biwi hai!
Ek chor Sardar jee k
mobile ko lekar bhar raha
tha.
Sardar hasne laga
Banta : Wo tumhare
mobile ko lekar bhag raha
hai aur tum hans rahe ho.
Sardar : Bhagne do,
charger to mere paas hai!
Santa ek black aur ek
white shocks pehenkar
school aata hai.
Madam : Ghar jao aur moje
badalkar aao.
Santa : Koi fayda nahi,
waha bhi ek black aur ek
white moja hi rakha hai.
Teacher : Santa batao ‘M’
for kya hota hai?
Santa : Sir, Mother!
Teacher : Right! Aab batao
W for kya hota hai?
Santa kuch sochne lagta
hai
Teacher : Santa kya soch
rahe ho?
Santa : Sir, mein yeh soch
raha tha ki Maa ulti kaise
ho gayi?
Girl-to-Boy – Aaye bewafe
tune sab kuch saaf kar
diya,
mera dil jala kar rakh kar
diya
Boy-to-Girl – Aye ladki, teri
kurbani bekar nahi jayegi,
bhej de rakh mujhe,
bartan manjne ke kaam
aayegi.
Santa : Banta itni sharab
na piya karo, tumhari
saanso tak se badbu aati
hai.
Yehi haal raha to tumhe
nark bhi jagah nahi milegi.
Banta : Don’t worry Santa.
Saanse to me yehi
chorrkar jaunga!!!
Sardar ne makhi ke legs
tod kar kaha, Ja udd ja..
Lekin Makkhi nahi udi, Sr
ne kaha..
“Aab to saabit ho gaya ki
agar makkhi ke legs tod di
jaye
to makkhi sun nahi
sakti!!!â€
Son(On Phone) : Maa! aaj
hum 2 se 3 ho gaye.
Mother : Sabbash Beta!
Ladka hua ya ladki.
Son : Nahi maa! tumhari
bahu ne dusri shaadi kar li.
Jo dete hai ladki ko tohfe,
Wo late hai unki shaadi
me sofe,
.
Jo jate hai unke piche,
Wo aate hai caro ke
neeche,
.
Jo kehte hai JAANU,
Wahi bante hai baacho ke
MAMU!!
tikh hai g bhot acha hai
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