Your 7 Circles by EloraM23 2013/01/20 02:45
It came out of a moment of great simplicity. Sitting under a tree, looking back over the events and people in my life, I realised I had come to a clearing.
A resting place. And out of that clarity came the realisation that I was in a new place. It felt fantastic.
I had finally let go of despair, blame, judgement, fear and shame.
I had found a way through the endless cycle of wondering what people were thinking of me, why they didn't get me, how I could prove myself, explain myself or show them who I really am.
I knew that I could finally stop...worrying.
It came out of a moment of great simplicity. Sitting under a tree, looking back over the events and people in my life, I realised I had come to a clearing.
A resting place. And out of that clarity came the realisation that I was in a new place. It felt fantastic.
I had finally let go of despair, blame, judgement, fear and shame.
I had found a way through the endless cycle of wondering what people were thinking of me, why they didn't get me, how I could prove myself, explain myself or show them who I really am.
I knew that I could finally stop...worrying.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 02:49
And start to live in a different way. But I didn't have to become a different person.
I just had to realise how to not only BE me, but how to let myself BE. And let everyone else in my life just be.
This is how I found The Circles...
Plato said that the soul is a Circle.
The Circles are a practical exercise to help you sort out your feelings. There are seven circles inside one main circle. All seven circles represent you. Your life. They are a bird's eye view of who you are and how you feel.
Each of the seven circles represents where people are in your life. Your relationships with them.
And start to live in a different way. But I didn't have to become a different person.
I just had to realise how to not only BE me, but how to let myself BE. And let everyone else in my life just be.
This is how I found The Circles...
Plato said that the soul is a Circle.
The Circles are a practical exercise to help you sort out your feelings. There are seven circles inside one main circle. All seven circles represent you. Your life. They are a bird's eye view of who you are and how you feel.
Each of the seven circles represents where people are in your life. Your relationships with them.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 02:53
You write down the names of people in your life according to where they fit in. The Circles are about living in the moment. They are NOT permanent. Feelings change, people come and go. The Circles will reflect these changes.
You begin by writing down in the 1st circle those who make you feel good about yourself. Move out through circles two, three, four and so on. Finally write down the people you find most challenging in the seventh circle...
By putting your feelings and thoughts about people in front of us, we can see how we feel about our relationships with them. The Circles give us freedom to enjoy those who make us feel good. Space to handle difficult relationships and help get rid of feelings that weigh us down. You may find the resulting clarity liberating.
You write down the names of people in your life according to where they fit in. The Circles are about living in the moment. They are NOT permanent. Feelings change, people come and go. The Circles will reflect these changes.
You begin by writing down in the 1st circle those who make you feel good about yourself. Move out through circles two, three, four and so on. Finally write down the people you find most challenging in the seventh circle...
By putting your feelings and thoughts about people in front of us, we can see how we feel about our relationships with them. The Circles give us freedom to enjoy those who make us feel good. Space to handle difficult relationships and help get rid of feelings that weigh us down. You may find the resulting clarity liberating.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 02:59
We all want to feel good about ourselves. But sometimes WE don't.
Sometimes, how we feel about ourselves depends on how we let other people affect us.
You can't force someone to like you. Belonging to a group where you feel afraid to be yourself can be unsettling, sometimes even humiliating.
We may end up feeling lonelier with the wrong people than you did on your own.
You might lose your way, try to change. Do things that you know aren't right for you. Or give away the very part of yourself that makes you...YOU.
We all want to feel good about ourselves. But sometimes WE don't.
Sometimes, how we feel about ourselves depends on how we let other people affect us.
You can't force someone to like you. Belonging to a group where you feel afraid to be yourself can be unsettling, sometimes even humiliating.
We may end up feeling lonelier with the wrong people than you did on your own.
You might lose your way, try to change. Do things that you know aren't right for you. Or give away the very part of yourself that makes you...YOU.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:01
Sometimes it takes years to learn how to look after yourself.
That's why it's important to have people around you who love you well.
Sometimes, even more than you can love yourself.
Shrug off the restraints that you have allowed others to place upon you.
Sometimes it takes years to learn how to look after yourself.
That's why it's important to have people around you who love you well.
Sometimes, even more than you can love yourself.
Shrug off the restraints that you have allowed others to place upon you.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:04
1. Find a piece of paper, and a pen or pencil.
2. On the piece of paper, draw the seven circles.
3. Write down the numbers from 1 to 7, beginning with the number 1 in the centre and working outwards to number 7.
4. Give yourself enough space for names. You can use either initials, first names or surnames.
5. Give yourself some time to think about your life, and the people in it - your family, friends, workmates, lovers.
6. You don't have to have a name in every circle. There can be more than one person in a circle.
7. You can change names and places whenever you want to. Nothing is permanent. Feelings change.
1. Find a piece of paper, and a pen or pencil.
2. On the piece of paper, draw the seven circles.
3. Write down the numbers from 1 to 7, beginning with the number 1 in the centre and working outwards to number 7.
4. Give yourself enough space for names. You can use either initials, first names or surnames.
5. Give yourself some time to think about your life, and the people in it - your family, friends, workmates, lovers.
6. You don't have to have a name in every circle. There can be more than one person in a circle.
7. You can change names and places whenever you want to. Nothing is permanent. Feelings change.
Jill 2013/01/20 03:04
Very meaningful wordz.. Every one wil face this kind of situation when dey r in new place.. There iz a quote- You are judged by the company you keep.!
Very meaningful wordz.. Every one wil face this kind of situation when dey r in new place.. There iz a quote- You are judged by the company you keep.!
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:09
Ask yourself....
How does this person make me feel? Can I be myself with them?
Am I honest with them?
Can I say what I want to?
Do I feel comfortable with them?
How do I feel when this person walks into a room?
How do I feel when the person leaves?
Do I change myself for them?
Do I want them to change for me?
Do I hide my real feelings or am I open when I'm with them?
Do they make me feel less or more than I am?
Do I trust them?
How do I feel when I talk with them?
Ask yourself....
How does this person make me feel? Can I be myself with them?
Am I honest with them?
Can I say what I want to?
Do I feel comfortable with them?
How do I feel when this person walks into a room?
How do I feel when the person leaves?
Do I change myself for them?
Do I want them to change for me?
Do I hide my real feelings or am I open when I'm with them?
Do they make me feel less or more than I am?
Do I trust them?
How do I feel when I talk with them?
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:13
The Circles are about recognition, NOT judgement.
Be honest with yourself.
Take your time with people you find difficult.
Try not to place someone in a particular circle because you think you should place them there.
Even though you spend a lot of time with a person, whether it be at work, home or socially, they don't have to be in the first three circles.
The wonderful thing about the Circles is that they are yours and yours alone.
No one can suggest or tell you where to put someone.
The seven circles make up one larger circle. One Life...Yours.
The Circles are about recognition, NOT judgement.
Be honest with yourself.
Take your time with people you find difficult.
Try not to place someone in a particular circle because you think you should place them there.
Even though you spend a lot of time with a person, whether it be at work, home or socially, they don't have to be in the first three circles.
The wonderful thing about the Circles is that they are yours and yours alone.
No one can suggest or tell you where to put someone.
The seven circles make up one larger circle. One Life...Yours.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:23
1st Circle -
This is the centre. The Self. The place where you feel strongest and true. The place you put people you trust with your heart and soul.
It is where you get to express all your hopes, dreams and thoughts. Take a moment to stop worrying. Doubting. And just be.
Put yourself in the centre and ask yourself:
Who knows me here?
Who can I trust with my life, my thoughts, my dreams?
Who makes me feel free to be myself?
1st Circle -
This is the centre. The Self. The place where you feel strongest and true. The place you put people you trust with your heart and soul.
It is where you get to express all your hopes, dreams and thoughts. Take a moment to stop worrying. Doubting. And just be.
Put yourself in the centre and ask yourself:
Who knows me here?
Who can I trust with my life, my thoughts, my dreams?
Who makes me feel free to be myself?
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:25
You may find it easy to put a few names in the centre. You may realise that is a place that only you can be in. You may find that it doesn't feel right to put the name of a close friend or relative. Don't worry. Trust your instincts.
The Circles are only momentary.
You can change your mind at any time. Don't let guilt or fear dictate your choices. This exercise is to find out how you feel.
TRUST YOURSELF
Some people find it hard to put themselves in the centre when they feel fearful, angry or can't love themselves.
Be Patient. Take your time.
You may find it easy to put a few names in the centre. You may realise that is a place that only you can be in. You may find that it doesn't feel right to put the name of a close friend or relative. Don't worry. Trust your instincts.
The Circles are only momentary.
You can change your mind at any time. Don't let guilt or fear dictate your choices. This exercise is to find out how you feel.
TRUST YOURSELF
Some people find it hard to put themselves in the centre when they feel fearful, angry or can't love themselves.
Be Patient. Take your time.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:30
2nd Circle -
You feel happy and strong with people in the Second circle. These are people with whom you have shared your values. Wonderful friends.
Circle Two represents:
Balance. Stability. Ease.
By understanding how others make you feel, you can get free of these feelings.
Once you can see what you are thinking, you may untie some of the knots.
2nd Circle -
You feel happy and strong with people in the Second circle. These are people with whom you have shared your values. Wonderful friends.
Circle Two represents:
Balance. Stability. Ease.
By understanding how others make you feel, you can get free of these feelings.
Once you can see what you are thinking, you may untie some of the knots.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:33
3rd Circle -
They may be acquaintances, friends, or family. Mentors or teachers. They help you grow. You respect them.
The people in the Third circle may be wonderful to spend time with, even though you may not see them often. They may be people who have moved out of your inner circle, but whom you still enjoy and feel good about.
Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom.
3rd Circle -
They may be acquaintances, friends, or family. Mentors or teachers. They help you grow. You respect them.
The people in the Third circle may be wonderful to spend time with, even though you may not see them often. They may be people who have moved out of your inner circle, but whom you still enjoy and feel good about.
Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:38
4th Circle -
These are the Moving Lines. This is the place where you can put people you have just met. The Fourth circle gives you time to think.
The Fourth Circle can help you bide your time. Withhold judgement. It is a neutral place. The people here are either coming in or going out.
I had found a kind of serenity, a new maturity...I didn't feel better or stronger than anyone else but it seemed no longer important whether everyone loved me or not - more important now was for me to love them. Feeling that way turns your whole life around; living becomes the act of giving.
4th Circle -
These are the Moving Lines. This is the place where you can put people you have just met. The Fourth circle gives you time to think.
The Fourth Circle can help you bide your time. Withhold judgement. It is a neutral place. The people here are either coming in or going out.
I had found a kind of serenity, a new maturity...I didn't feel better or stronger than anyone else but it seemed no longer important whether everyone loved me or not - more important now was for me to love them. Feeling that way turns your whole life around; living becomes the act of giving.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:43
5th Circle -
The Fifth Circle is the beginning of your strength and resolve. This is where you put people who are holding you back. The people here are not necessarily connected with the real you.
The Fifth Circle gives you the chance to stop explaining yourself, and to let go of feelings of inadequacy.
People in the Fifth Circle may also be moving closer to your centre, after having been in the Sixth or Seventh Circle.
Children often ask "But what if they make me feel bad?"
They should always be told. "It's a choice. No one can make you feel anything unless you let them."
The Circles may help you stop blaming others.
5th Circle -
The Fifth Circle is the beginning of your strength and resolve. This is where you put people who are holding you back. The people here are not necessarily connected with the real you.
The Fifth Circle gives you the chance to stop explaining yourself, and to let go of feelings of inadequacy.
People in the Fifth Circle may also be moving closer to your centre, after having been in the Sixth or Seventh Circle.
Children often ask "But what if they make me feel bad?"
They should always be told. "It's a choice. No one can make you feel anything unless you let them."
The Circles may help you stop blaming others.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:47
6th Circle -
The Sixth Circle is where you create a sense of release. People here may seem important to you, your career or in your social life, but try as you will, you can't feel comfortable with them. Unable to feel close to them, they unsettle you when you see them.
The Sixth Circle is a chance to redefine how you see yourself. This is where your frustration over someone can be softened.
From here, you may begin to open your heart to people you have "given up" on. Sometimes we take people who love us for granted and spend more energy trying to please or impress new and "exciting" people.
6th Circle -
The Sixth Circle is where you create a sense of release. People here may seem important to you, your career or in your social life, but try as you will, you can't feel comfortable with them. Unable to feel close to them, they unsettle you when you see them.
The Sixth Circle is a chance to redefine how you see yourself. This is where your frustration over someone can be softened.
From here, you may begin to open your heart to people you have "given up" on. Sometimes we take people who love us for granted and spend more energy trying to please or impress new and "exciting" people.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 03:52
7th Circle -
The Seventh Circle is the furthest out. This is where you place people who have hurt you, angered you or let you down. From here you can start letting go of painful thoughts and feelings. The Seventh Circle may help you find your centre again.
Some people are probably asking themselves why there isn't a seventeenth circle, or a seventieth, or a circle that is so far away that you don't have to face it or think about it.
But this is where The Circles stop. The distance that the Seventh Circle gives you can heal anger and emotional illness that wears you down. The positive aspect of the Seventh Circle can help you find rest and release.
You can transcend all negativity when you realise that the only power it has over you is your belief in it. As your experience this truth about yourself, you are set free.
7th Circle -
The Seventh Circle is the furthest out. This is where you place people who have hurt you, angered you or let you down. From here you can start letting go of painful thoughts and feelings. The Seventh Circle may help you find your centre again.
Some people are probably asking themselves why there isn't a seventeenth circle, or a seventieth, or a circle that is so far away that you don't have to face it or think about it.
But this is where The Circles stop. The distance that the Seventh Circle gives you can heal anger and emotional illness that wears you down. The positive aspect of the Seventh Circle can help you find rest and release.
You can transcend all negativity when you realise that the only power it has over you is your belief in it. As your experience this truth about yourself, you are set free.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 04:04
The Circles In Your Family -
Families can be wonderful. The place where we find unconditional love and endless support. Our own personal cheer squad. Our closest friends. Families can be the most challenging parts of our lives. They can be confusing, frustrating, depleting, and sometimes even cruel.
Some of the largest shifts in the Circles have been with people who have felt pressure to keep family members in their inner circles. They think they are being disloyal if they move family members beyond the first three circles. Sometimes it takes a little while and a lot of courage before the shift begins. Remember, this is not a permanent exercise, nor is it meant to be judgemental.
The Circles In Your Family -
Families can be wonderful. The place where we find unconditional love and endless support. Our own personal cheer squad. Our closest friends. Families can be the most challenging parts of our lives. They can be confusing, frustrating, depleting, and sometimes even cruel.
Some of the largest shifts in the Circles have been with people who have felt pressure to keep family members in their inner circles. They think they are being disloyal if they move family members beyond the first three circles. Sometimes it takes a little while and a lot of courage before the shift begins. Remember, this is not a permanent exercise, nor is it meant to be judgemental.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 04:08
Family members have a very strong view of you. They tend to believe that their view is the right one. The trouble is, they usually need to be slightly "above" you to have this viewpoint.
This is where it gets difficult. Yes, they know you well, but you may have changed, quite a lot. They may not have noticed the changes or have not changed much themselves, so they keep relating to you in the same way.
Try as you may, they will not let go of their out-dated version of "you". Often because they don't want to, or can't. Placing these family members further out may give you a chance to find rest, release and clarity. You may find it easier to be with them. You may start to heal old wounds.
Family members have a very strong view of you. They tend to believe that their view is the right one. The trouble is, they usually need to be slightly "above" you to have this viewpoint.
This is where it gets difficult. Yes, they know you well, but you may have changed, quite a lot. They may not have noticed the changes or have not changed much themselves, so they keep relating to you in the same way.
Try as you may, they will not let go of their out-dated version of "you". Often because they don't want to, or can't. Placing these family members further out may give you a chance to find rest, release and clarity. You may find it easier to be with them. You may start to heal old wounds.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 04:14
The Circles with Friends -
A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature. Friendship is a gift. A friend will back you up, won't run you down or talk behind your back. A friend will love you and your loved ones, but would never take advantage of you or betray you. A friend will keep your innermost secrets safe. Value your beliefs, your dreams. Uphold and honour your morals. Understand you, and let you be yourself.
And then there are the people who say they are your friends, but:
Undermine you. Deplete you. Let you down. Try to change you. Take away your faith in yourself.
In times like these, the Circles may help.
A wonderful part of life. An unexpected surprise. A friend is a companion, someone you can talk to, who'll listen and laugh with you. A true friend won't let you down, but will help you through the rough bits, and carry you through the times when you think you can't go on.
The Circles with Friends -
A friend may well be reckoned the masterpiece of nature. Friendship is a gift. A friend will back you up, won't run you down or talk behind your back. A friend will love you and your loved ones, but would never take advantage of you or betray you. A friend will keep your innermost secrets safe. Value your beliefs, your dreams. Uphold and honour your morals. Understand you, and let you be yourself.
And then there are the people who say they are your friends, but:
Undermine you. Deplete you. Let you down. Try to change you. Take away your faith in yourself.
In times like these, the Circles may help.
A wonderful part of life. An unexpected surprise. A friend is a companion, someone you can talk to, who'll listen and laugh with you. A true friend won't let you down, but will help you through the rough bits, and carry you through the times when you think you can't go on.
EloraM23 2013/01/20 04:18
The Circles at Work -
Wherever you work, there will always be good and bad days. The workplace is where we can be productive, creative, intelligent, useful, in charge. To earn a living, be recognised for all our hard work. For some of us, going to work can be the opposite. Work becomes the thing we dread, a place where we struggle to be heard, where we work hard for seemingly little reward. The most frustrating part of your day may be a person you have to work with, and too much time and energy is spent thinking about them.
The Circles at Work -
Wherever you work, there will always be good and bad days. The workplace is where we can be productive, creative, intelligent, useful, in charge. To earn a living, be recognised for all our hard work. For some of us, going to work can be the opposite. Work becomes the thing we dread, a place where we struggle to be heard, where we work hard for seemingly little reward. The most frustrating part of your day may be a person you have to work with, and too much time and energy is spent thinking about them.
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