come in and laugh away you problems
manfred 2012/07/19 08:40
manfred 2012/07/19 08:40
A guy on a taxi wanting to ask
the driver a question
touched him on his Shoulder.
The driver screamed,
lost control
of the car and nearly hit a
bus, went
up on the footpath and
stopped
few centimeters far from a
shop window.
For a second, everything
went quiet
in the taxi. Then, the driver
said;
Guy don't ever
do that
again, you scared me.
The guy
apologised and
said; I did not realise that a
little touch will scare you so
much.
The driver replied; Sorry, It is
not really your fault. Today
is my first
day as a taxi driver. I have
been driving a van for the last
25 years, carrying
dead bodies.
I thought a dead body was
touching me
the driver a question
touched him on his Shoulder.
The driver screamed,
lost control
of the car and nearly hit a
bus, went
up on the footpath and
stopped
few centimeters far from a
shop window.
For a second, everything
went quiet
in the taxi. Then, the driver
said;
Guy don't ever
do that
again, you scared me.
The guy
apologised and
said; I did not realise that a
little touch will scare you so
much.
The driver replied; Sorry, It is
not really your fault. Today
is my first
day as a taxi driver. I have
been driving a van for the last
25 years, carrying
dead bodies.
I thought a dead body was
touching me
manfred 2012/07/19 08:45
There were three babies in a
woman's womb, and they were
discussing what
they would like to be when they
were out in the world and
grown
up.
The first one said "I wanna be a
plumber." The others laughed at
this,
and asked why he wanted be be
a
plumber. He replied, "So I can fix
the pipes in here, it's kinda
leaky."
The second one said "I wanna be
an electrician." The others
thought this was kind of silly
too
and asked why.
The second baby answered, "so I
can get some lights in here, its
dark!"
The third one said, "I wanna be
a
boxer." The others thought this
was hilarious, and laughed for a
full five minutes,
before asking, "Why in God's
name do you want to be a
boxer?"
He replied, "So," he said proudly,
"I
can beat the hell out of that
bald
guy who keeps coming in here
and spitting on us
There were three babies in a
woman's womb, and they were
discussing what
they would like to be when they
were out in the world and
grown
up.
The first one said "I wanna be a
plumber." The others laughed at
this,
and asked why he wanted be be
a
plumber. He replied, "So I can fix
the pipes in here, it's kinda
leaky."
The second one said "I wanna be
an electrician." The others
thought this was kind of silly
too
and asked why.
The second baby answered, "so I
can get some lights in here, its
dark!"
The third one said, "I wanna be
a
boxer." The others thought this
was hilarious, and laughed for a
full five minutes,
before asking, "Why in God's
name do you want to be a
boxer?"
He replied, "So," he said proudly,
"I
can beat the hell out of that
bald
guy who keeps coming in here
and spitting on us
manfred 2012/07/19 08:50
A married lady was going into a
hotel with her boyfriend
immediately she saw her
husband coming out of the same
hotel with his girlfriend, On
sighting the husband, The lady
quickly said
"I DON CATCH YOU TODAY, THANK
GOD I BROUGHT A WITNESS".
The man looked at her boldly &
then turned to his girlfriend &
said"SISTER MERCY YOU SEE WHAT
I'VE TOLD U, IF WE HAD LEFT FOR
THE CHURCH EARLIER WE WON'T
HAVE GAUGHT HER HERE"
A married lady was going into a
hotel with her boyfriend
immediately she saw her
husband coming out of the same
hotel with his girlfriend, On
sighting the husband, The lady
quickly said
"I DON CATCH YOU TODAY, THANK
GOD I BROUGHT A WITNESS".
The man looked at her boldly &
then turned to his girlfriend &
said"SISTER MERCY YOU SEE WHAT
I'VE TOLD U, IF WE HAD LEFT FOR
THE CHURCH EARLIER WE WON'T
HAVE GAUGHT HER HERE"
manfred 2012/07/19 17:49
7 months old twin babies in the
womb
saw a joystick coming towards
them.
The 1st baby said see daddy is
coming
inside to say hello. The 2nd baby
said,
chineke! Its uncle. Daddy never
comes in with raincoat
7 months old twin babies in the
womb
saw a joystick coming towards
them.
The 1st baby said see daddy is
coming
inside to say hello. The 2nd baby
said,
chineke! Its uncle. Daddy never
comes in with raincoat
manfred 2012/07/28 21:09
A woman was at home when she hears someone knock at the door. She goes to the door and opens the door to see a man standing there. He asks the lady, 'Do you have a vagina?' She slams the door in disgust. The next morning she hears a knock at the door and it is the same man and he asks the same question of the woman, 'Do you have a vagina?' She slams the door again. Later that night when her husband gets home she tells him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells the wife in a loving and concerned voice 'Honey, I am taking tomorrow off to be home just in case this guy shows up again.' The next morning they hear a knock and both run for the door. The husband says to the wife in a whispered voice, 'Honey, I'm going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to see where the bastard is going with it.' She nods yes to her husband and opens the door. Sure enough the same fellow is standing there and asks the same question; 'Do you have vagina'? 'Yes, actually I have,' she says. The man replies.. 'Good! Would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife's alone and start using yours
A woman was at home when she hears someone knock at the door. She goes to the door and opens the door to see a man standing there. He asks the lady, 'Do you have a vagina?' She slams the door in disgust. The next morning she hears a knock at the door and it is the same man and he asks the same question of the woman, 'Do you have a vagina?' She slams the door again. Later that night when her husband gets home she tells him what has happened for the last two days. The husband tells the wife in a loving and concerned voice 'Honey, I am taking tomorrow off to be home just in case this guy shows up again.' The next morning they hear a knock and both run for the door. The husband says to the wife in a whispered voice, 'Honey, I'm going to hide behind the door and listen and if it is the same guy I want you to answer yes to the question because I want to see where the bastard is going with it.' She nods yes to her husband and opens the door. Sure enough the same fellow is standing there and asks the same question; 'Do you have vagina'? 'Yes, actually I have,' she says. The man replies.. 'Good! Would you mind telling your husband to leave my wife's alone and start using yours
manfred 2012/07/29 04:25
Joke
A Man went for Hiv test in a
hospital on a Friday morning and
was told to come
back for the result the following
Monday. He went to church on
Sunday. Pastor declared to the
congregation; Everything you
are looking forward to this
week will be positive.
The man stood up and shouted;
I reject it in
Jesus name, my own go be
Negative in thy mighty name of
Jesus. AMEN
Joke
A Man went for Hiv test in a
hospital on a Friday morning and
was told to come
back for the result the following
Monday. He went to church on
Sunday. Pastor declared to the
congregation; Everything you
are looking forward to this
week will be positive.
The man stood up and shouted;
I reject it in
Jesus name, my own go be
Negative in thy mighty name of
Jesus. AMEN
manfred 2012/07/29 04:31
Joke
an alcohol factory the regular
taster died
and the director started looking
for a new
one to hire. A drunkard with
ragged, dirty
look came to apply for the
position.The
director of the factory
wondered how to
send him away. They tested
him.They gave
him a glass with a drink. He
tried it and
said,... "It's red wine, a muscat,
three years
old, grown on a north slope,
matured in
steel containers.""That's correct",
said the
boss. Another glass."It's red wine,
cabernet, eight years old, a
south western
slope, oak barrels.""Correct."The
director
was astonished. He winked at his
secretary to suggest something.
She
brought in a glass of urine. The
alcoholic
tried it. "It's a blonde, 26 years
old, three
months pregnant, made inside
the work
office. And if you don't give me
the job, I'll
also tell who's the father!" "The
boss
collapsed
Joke
an alcohol factory the regular
taster died
and the director started looking
for a new
one to hire. A drunkard with
ragged, dirty
look came to apply for the
position.The
director of the factory
wondered how to
send him away. They tested
him.They gave
him a glass with a drink. He
tried it and
said,... "It's red wine, a muscat,
three years
old, grown on a north slope,
matured in
steel containers.""That's correct",
said the
boss. Another glass."It's red wine,
cabernet, eight years old, a
south western
slope, oak barrels.""Correct."The
director
was astonished. He winked at his
secretary to suggest something.
She
brought in a glass of urine. The
alcoholic
tried it. "It's a blonde, 26 years
old, three
months pregnant, made inside
the work
office. And if you don't give me
the job, I'll
also tell who's the father!" "The
boss
collapsed
#45 Fun & Comedy
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